We’re trying something different this week! In an effort to reach out to the NA crowd, to capitalize on my love of all things coffee, and to get a turnaround on this Velnias release, let’s grip it and rip it a little early. It’s never too early to drink from the cup of heresy. This week’s offerings: Velnias’ Substrate Haruspex and Backyard Beans Coffee Company’s Punch in the Face.
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The Tunes: Velnias’ Substrate Haruspex
Velnias are a name that does not often pop up on our promo planner, but when it does, it’s cause for delight amongst the masses. As my esteemed sibling put it many moons ago in a similar piece: “…Velnias are plenty capable of making music that is both purposeful and downright fun along the way.” I would second that emotion highly, and while they are known for taking their sweet time with their release schedule, they also make sure they use that time to hone their discography into quality over quantity. Case in point, Substrate Haruspex was recorded way back in 2024, but is only seeing the light of day now. The time, careful consideration and meditative thought that runs through Substrate Haruspex, and all their albums, is a staple of their sound and schtick. On this, their fourth full-length offering, Velnias “present a dense and atmospheric sonic journey into the unraveling and reconstruction of the self beneath the vastness of the infinitely unfolding Macrocosm [and] herald the expulsion of delusion, dissolution of the confines, splintering of the construct, and kindling of the forsaken fire amidst the shadow of Nihil ascendant.” Those are…certainly some words there. But what does it all mean?
It means this album kinda rules. “Folk doom” is the moniker used to describe Velnias’ genre, but if you’re expecting acoustics, tribal percussion, flutes or some such, don’t get it twisted: the “doom” is at the musical forefront, the “folk” is more of the aesthetics, and Velnias don’t skimp on the doom when the doom gets going. The first proper track “Divination of the Simulacra” is a perfect example of this meld: the doom is slow, but not plodding, and the guitars weave in and out of each other with intricate melodies that are unconventional but primal in the lyrical way that speaks to the baser parts of my brain. This isn’t the kind of ultra-heavy, crushing doom that more extreme bands go for; instead, Velnias lean pretty heavily on groove and genuinely rocking compositions to contrast the deeply meditative and esoteric lyrics and vibes. My only real gripe with Substrate Haruspex is that going into it, you have to make sure that you see this album as one long piece instead of a whole made up of multiple tracks. Substrate Haruspex is eight songs long and fully half of them could be considered “interludes,” which might irritate people who are looking for more of the “meat” of the album. Still, they are genuinely cool tracks that serve as bridges between the core songs, and there’s a pretty seamless flow between all the tracks on the album. As long as you think of the album as more of a holistic, ritual performance and less of an “album,” then you’re going to love this one.
Substrate Haruspex is available now on Eisenwald. For more information on Velnias, visit their Facebook page.
The Booze Beverage: Backyard Beans Coffee Company’s Punch in the Face
I never thought I would be a cold brew kind of guy until I had no choice but to be. At some level, I’ll always be like my dad and need a boiling hot cup of coffee, even on a sweltering hot day, but as I dive deeper and explore the intricacies of coffee, I’m being drawn into the world of cold brew and how changing the brew process unlocks new dimensions in the beans themselves. I’ve recently reviewed a shandy that has been my favorite hot weather caffeine delivery vector, and that got me thinking I need to go further into the sort of “fast casual” world of cold brew cans, which brought me to Pennsylvania’s Backyard Beans and their flagship brew Punch in the Face. This is a single origin bean from Honduras that has been actively brewed at room temperature, to allow the brewers to suit the timing to the particular batch itself, and then rapidly chilled and nitro’d up. Cracking open the can immediately hit me with a rush of chocolate aroma, but the drink itself is surprisingly well balanced. It’s definitely got the sweetness and richness you’d expect, but I found as the can warmed up, a lot more of the bright, fruity notes evolved, and there’s a pleasantly bracing bitterness on the finish that fades into a delicate, floral aftertaste that stuck around for a while after the sip was over. I don’t think I shook it up enough to properly activate the nitro, because it wasn’t as full-bodied as I wanted it to be, but that was probably user error, and the drink was good enough that I’m definitely going back for more.
The week might only be halfway over, but the light at the end of the tunnel approaches. Until then, cheers and be good to each other.
— Ian
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