CURSED IMAGERY: The Month in Album Art (April 2025)

May 2, 2025

album artwork, album covers, amateur podiatry, assimilated transdimensionalization, black sword thunder attack, caos ritual, childz play, cover art, Cursed Imagery, devilgoat, disastrous murmur, ghastly act, håndgemeng, venator

Welcome back, friends! It’s May, and as of this post dropping, I’m on vacation! Not a long one. Just a weekend trip. But still, a vacation! In any case, May brings many things: flowers, the end of the European football season, and – of course – bad album art from April. And, oh boy, was there a smorgasbord of bad album art to choose from last month.

This is the first instance of Cursed Imagery so far this year that had me genuinely at a loss when it came time to picking a “Best/Worst Nine.” According to Encyclopedia Metallum, there were a total of 613 full-length albums released this month — four pages’ worth in their listings! — and I’d already accumulated a dozen or so serious-contender picks before I’d finished looking through the first page. Like, bands? You really brought your F-games this month. I salute y’all.

In the end, I didn’t pick a “Best/Worst Nine.” You guys get a bonus this month! We’ll have an even ten for you. That’s just the kind of generous guy I am. Anyway, enough dilly-dallying. Hit the jump below and let’s check ’em out.

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Venator – Psychodrome

This reminds me of a more washed-out version of Scorpions’ Blackout. Conceptually, I can’t tell if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. But from a color standpoint, it’s, uh… yikes.

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Devilgoat – Hell is Within Me, and the Maledictions are Set Forth on this World

Bro looks like a variation of Clown from Slipknot. Also, wonder which NYC subway line Devilgoat was riding when he/she/they/it? overheard an unwell person say these exact words and decided it’d make a good album title.

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Ghastly Act – Painful Mutations

Well, they got the “painful” part right, at least…

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Caos Ritual – Souls Corrupted, Vile Misdeeds

I felt a kind of kinship with this penciled-in quintet. It represents about as far as my own “artistic” ability ever got. I desperately wanted to be able to draw exhilarating action scenes, comic-book-style… but I never got past “Beavis and Butthead cutting-room-floor outtakes.” Sigh.

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Amateur Podiatry – Arch Madness

I love everything about this. And, I reckon, there’s a certain subset of visitors to certain websites that will really love everything about this. In any case, bravo, folks. Bravo.

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Disastrous Murmur – Death Unconquered

I gotta say, for just having disemboweled this poor woman — not to mention apparently having done a lot of worse shit to a lot of other folks — there’s a real “hi, Mom!” energy to this guy. That goofy grin doesn’t make his face look particularly threatening at all.

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Childz Play – Big City

I found it: the worst band logo.

Also, “childz” with a “z”. LOL.

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Black Sword Thunder Attack – Black Sword Thunder Attack

LOL juuuuuust kidding, I’ve actually found the worst band logo now. This is it. Not Childz Play. This.

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Assimilated Transdimensionalization – Neuroforged in the Womb of Wires

Gesundheit
This looks like a brutal death take on one of those old “angel / devil on your shoulder” cartoons. Except instead of one giving advice for heaven and the other for hell, one’s giving advice for hell and the other’s giving advice for SUPERHELL.

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Håndgemeng – Satanic Panic Attack

A man in a tuxedo clapping, appearing to applaud enthusiastically, with a dimly lit background.

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That’ll do it for April! You know the drill from here: check back this time next month for the best/worst album covers from May. But until then…

Keep it heavy,
–Dan