Hey, friends. Little bit late with our Quickies tonight, but you can bet your asses they’ll have been worth the wait. Because dear lord do we have a list for you today. Awesome stuff, LOL stuff, you name it. I’ll stop talking and get to the Quickies–here’s what we missed in the metal world today:

• This actually happened on Saturday, but it’s too good to omit–someone showed up to Mike Portnoy’s in-store appearance over the weekend in a post–Portnoy Dream Theater shirt. And because Mike is actually still a child, he’s none too thrilled about it. (WARNING: MANY LULZ TO FOLLOW)
• That long-rumored super-tour with Machine Head, Children of Bodom, Epica and Battlecross? Welp, it just became official. 10/16 at Terminal 5, I’m looking at you.
• Remember the #babymetalparty? Welp, it’s about to get a whole lot bigger. The “band” made its U.S. debut at a sold-out Fonda Theatre in Los Angeles, ahead of some upcoming opening gigs for Lady Gaga.
• Slipknot put out another teaser for JESUS FUCKING CHRIST WILL YOU GUYS JUST MAKE SOME SORT OF ACTUAL STATEMENT ABOUT THE NEW ALBUM ALREADY?
• More tour news: Deicide, Septicflesh, Marduk and something called Carach Angren will be hitting the road together sometime later this…fall? Winter? Dunno, no dates have been announced yet.
• And finally, remember the guy who did those hilarious Slayer covers on ukelele? Well, he’s moved on to Cannibal Corpse now. Check it out:

Solid chops as always, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have a bit trouble getting through it. Although that’s probably more down to Cannibal Corpse than to Rob, if I’m being honest. Anyway, that’ll wrap up for now. Check back tomorrow for more!

-Dan

Live. Love. Plow. Horns Up.