Well now, we haven’t done one of these for awhile. Must have been at least a week, right? Okay, so it’s been more than that. REGARDLESS, Stage Dive is back and ready to open the floor to only the most imperative topics in the metal world. So a brief recap, I pose a question, provide my input, and you share yours in the comments. It’s not that complicated. Let’s roll.

You know what accompanies aggressive music rather well? Booze. Lots of booze. Booze brings out great times and great memories (or brown/blackouts). Somehow, we have not brought alcohol into this site all that frequently. So I say this is a good time to do just that. So my question to you this week is:

WHICH ARTIST WOULD YOU WANT TO GET DRUNK WITH THE MOST?

Now THIS is a loaded question. Let’s confirm one thing: this is very subjective. It could be who you find the most interesting life-ically, who you expect to throw the most ridiculous party, or, quite simply, your favorite musician. The first individual that came to mind for me was Devin Townsend (and he finished as a very close second). The ridiculous variety of music he’s played with Strapping Young Lad and as a solo project on top of his bipolar disorder and past substance use, a ridiculous time is guaranteed. That wasn’t enough though. So I let curiosity take over and fell to Ihsahn. I’ve appreciated just about everything the man has done over the years–both his solo work and obviously Emperor. But frankly what I’m most interested in is his recount of the 90’s in the extreme metal underground in Scandinavia. The church burnings and murders have always fascinated me because I see them as a evidence to constantly need to push the envelope. It’d be incredible to hear a firsthand account. But no, still not enough. I fell to one Adam Darski. Most of you may know him as Nergal.

This should really not come as a surprise. My feelings toward Behemoth are widely known. Naturally, the figure in metal I would want to get drunk with the most is their legendary frontman. But let’s cover why.

• Well, I just mentioned my obsession with the band, so that part is obvious. I could talk Behemoth music with the dude for days on end, from their albums to their stage presence. Especially the stage presence. They still hold the title as best live band I’ve seen (not best concert, let’s be clear). I also like booze. So, hand-in-hand much?
• This man is a very free-thinking, knowledge-seeking heretic. I consider myself similar but in a far lesser light. He has been known to denounce Catholicism and has faced legal conflicts over tearing a bible on stage during a live performance. A+. I am very much looking forward to reading Sacrum Profanus, his autobiography that finally gets an English-language release. It’ll be a fascinating read for me. Sometimes drunken talk gets a little serious. There would none more serious than this.
• The dude overcame leukemia and then promptly toured Evangelion and then a few years later give us The Satanist. Several months of recovery, not a beat was missed by him or Behemoth and their live performance only got better. Dying to know what he pulled from that experience and what changed because of it.
• His overall not-give-a-fuck-ery. It seems like half the things he says are in some way controversial. Remember that time he called out American death metal bands? I don’t agree with everything he says, but I’m an adult and understand what difference in opinion means. It’s more about respecting that he speaks his mind regardless of feedback. I can only imagine how alcohol would further enhance this.

So let’s wrap this up. I would imagine a drunken situation with Nergal includes a lot of booze in a dark cellar bar with a lot of in-depth discussion regarding religion and the human race. And ideally, plenty of the infinite stories he’s inevitably built up over the years with Behemoth and otherwise. Plus, the whole not giving a shit thing could lead to some crazy interactions within a bar. Which I would fully appreciate. Hmmm, minus the whole Nergal part, it already kinda sounds like a night out for me in Portsmouth. I’ll accept it. Oh well, this will probably never happen. But at least I can drunkenly read his autobiography soon, close as I’m gonna get I’m sure.

So what say you? Share below. Or don’t.

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“Ein bier…bitte”

-Corey

Live. Love. Plow. Horns Up.